NO MORE RESOLUTIONS FOR 2012

I went to the top of Mauna Kea last Saturday, the highest point in the state of Hawai'i, nearly 14,000 feet above sea level.  The air was thin and cold but the view was astounding.  It was a symbolic trip that I had been planning for weeks, a representation of the great transitions that are taking place in my life at this very moment.

The top of a mountain is a wonderful place to reflect.  I thought about all the experiences I have had during the 2011, the people I met and the people I lost and the important lessons I've learned.  People, experiences and information shape and alter us constantly, so the January 1, 2011 version of Benson Medina doesn't exist anymore.  Fortunately, I've been replaced by a newer and upgraded version of me.  At the top of Mauna Kea, you feel the paradox of being a tiny spec in the Universe and the sense of unlimited possibilities at the same time.  It's an awesome feeling.

Like most people, I had made resolutions to change things in my life a year ago.  I pretty much went with the standard five resolutions that are the most popular in our country: 1) Save money, 2) Lose weight, 3) Get in a relationship, 4) Exercise more, 5) Spend more time with friends and family (coincidentally, these are same "most popular" resolutions for 2012).

I started out with great intentions to make significant improvements in my health, finances, relationships and my passion for writing.  I had a step-by-step plan on how my goals were going to be gloriously achieved through my own hard work and dedication.  I look back on that and laugh now, thinking that I probably sounded like a five year-old who wants to be an astronaut but doesn't like math.  It just wasn't going to happen the way I envisioned it because the powers that run the Universe have their own plan based on what you need to learn.  Many people believe that things happen in "God's time" and I've seen enough in my life to be one of those believers.

I think your "intention" is the most important thing.  I wrote a few weeks back that Oprah says "intention is the greatest determining factor of outcome."  You keep putting your intention (and effort) out there and the Universe responds.  I'm sure God had a few chuckles at my "plan" but he couldn't ignore my intention so he (or she) responded.

Right off the bat, he sent me Liana Honda, a bundle of health and exercise energy who signed me up for a 365 mile challenge that involved walking 365 miles during the calendar year.  I ended up walking over 500 miles, but once I moved to Hilo, she got me into Zumba (and instructor Kanani De Sa, another fireball of pure motion).  Now I'm in a circle of people who are dedicated to daily fitness which is a complete 180 from where I was a year ago.

In June, Wainani Kealoha showed up to teach me about healthy eating and how my diet was slowly killing me.  She didn't have to bend my arm to convince me to make changes, I simply looked at her health and lifestyle.  We're the same age, but she weighs basically the same as she did in high school  and she still dances hula professionally in an industry that is dominated by 20 year-olds.  A whole foods, plant based diet trimmed off 20 pounds, dropped my cholesterol 50 points and my blood pressure 30 points.  Do you think she showed up by accident?  I don't think so.

The most impactful event of 2011 was the passing of my sister Lani's partner, Michael McGuire.  His death, of a massive underwater cardiac arrest on July 1, triggered a series of events that were life-changing for me (and obviously for my sister).  First, it brought me to Hilo to live with my sister who was not in any shape emotionally to face life on her own.  Second, it focused my attention on her and the paralyzing grief that completely shut her life down.  Lani lost her passion for the business she had grown into a huge success (Maui's Ali'i Kula Lavender Farm) and decided to open a new business with me working in grief recovery.

Part of helping my sister to get back on her feet emotionally, was showing her how strong we can be on our own.  But in the process, I was the one really getting the lesson.  Seeing myself as whole and complete without a partner was not something I truly believed for myself, but teaching it to my sister brought the principle to full life for me.   The real relationship I needed for 2011 was the relationship with myself, finally seeing myself as strong and capable without a partner.  That was an epic break through for me.

It's been terrific living with my sister is so many ways.  We grow up with our siblings, but don't really know them as adults and to have that opportunity while we are still young and healthy is truly amazing.  Of course, it's had a great impact on us financially, because now we work together and share the household expenses, so it's saved us quite a bit of money over our previous situations.

Looking back at the resolutions I made at the beginning of 2011: Save money, check. Lose weight, check.  Get in a relationship, check.  Exercise more, check.  Spend more time with friends and family, check.  All accomplished in ways I could not imagine.  I guess you really DO have to be "careful what you ask for."

I used to be amazed at how tragedy eventually yields such useful and timely lessons and how people coincidentally show up exactly when you need them.   I'm not amazed anymore, but simply grateful to experience how God truly DOES work in mysterious ways to deliver the things we need to really understand this precious life we were given.   It really is a perfect Universe if we can just have the patience to see it that way.

So for 2012 I decided not to waste time with resolutions.  I'll simply hold the intention that my life will improve in ways that will help me and see how creative God can get this year.  I can hardly wait!